What about that Metro Last Light ? Russian post-apocalyptic shooter quick review

22 May

As a person who was raised guided by the Road Warrior’s words, I enjoy everything that implies the continuity of human life after a certain doom. Preferably nuclear

So I got my hands on Metro Last Light, mostly by accident. It is a beautiful game, a detailed world, interesting enough enemies and monsters. The thing is I had problems running it smoothly ( I7 3770k 2gb AMD v card – but some people were running it on ultra with less powerful systems) , turns out it’s some issue with AMD videocards, and I didn’t want to install any updates afraid of ruining my saved games. Maybe it’s fixed now, I didn’t check anymore. But you should before acquiring the game

As far as combat goes it’s really smooth & fun – you can compare it to bigger franchises best shooters (CoD,Rage etc) . Headshot counts, there’s plenty of sneaking & exploring is interesting. I rushed through the cities but if you listen carefully everybody has a story to say, although with the same russian accent it kinda gets annoying after a while.

What do you mean my flight got delayed ?

What do you mean my flight got delayed ?

The plot without spoiling anything continues from the previous game where our hero nuked out the so-called Dark Ones, with who he shared some kind of connection. That’s where the game picks off, supposedly extinct you’re sent to capture or kill some lil darkie – Then it’s a thrill ride, much in the style of Modern Warfare series – a lot of scripted events which should be fun but sometimes are downright retarded.  The problem with the game it’s that you require a lot of filters for your gas mask. While it certainly adds to the mood, the implementation is poor and makes you rush through some interesting scenery. The even worst part is that along with the savepoint system and the scripted events it will kill you, repeatedly. Not only once I was suffocating slamming my fist frustrated into the desk while everybody was chatting casually about how hard life is.

The weapons are the same old ones with military grade ammo serving double purpose, as currency aswell. You can’t do a lot of backtracking so once you leave an area you’ll find yourself unable to return no matter how much you’ll want.

The game features a good or bad ending, basically you need to save some random civilians from time to time, or bring a toy to some kid, spare some enemies and so on. Although it sounds nice, you don’t get too much satisfaction out of it.

There’s a good amount of nudity in the game, you can even pay for some boring lapdances and there is a predictable sex scene but I found it lacking and poorly implemented. If you’re looking for more skin here’s some from an obscure side of the internet

In conclusion I’m having a bit of mixed feelings about it – with about 10h to play, no multiplayer yet – issues with running smoothly & low replayability – my advice is get it from a friend. It’s at best 8/10

Naked Protesters vs Putin & Merkel (Bonus photos!)

8 Apr

Those clothless vigilantes over at Femen strike again! This time in Hanover at the trade fair. Guess they were busy in heartless negotiation because his excellency, Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin ( or Double V.P  how we affectionately call him here ) “liked” twice the naked protester

On her back it's her phone number

On her back it’s her phone number

Not joking about the liking part, he actually told the journalists that he thought Merkel wanted to smooth negotiation over with what he fondly called “doublovskaia treyaskiva” ( double threesome )

It took the president a few minutes and a couple of over-zealous bodyguards to understand what was going on

"Fuck Putin ? Da !!! Right here ?!?!"  he was heard saying while pointing repeatedly to the ground

“Fuck Putin ? Da !!! Right here ?!?!” he was heard saying while pointing repeatedly to the ground

A deeply saddened Putin had this to say to the press for the excellent coverage of the event “You cockblocked the mighty tzar today but know that I already fucked Ukraine “while shaking his fists like an angry bear. Luckily,  Angela Merkel intervened and calmed things down with typical western promises & beer.

"Democracy, Vlad .. Is big fucking joke, ja ?"

“Democracy, Vlad .. Is big fucking joke, ja ?”

Well not so fast Angela Dorothea Merkel ! What do you have to comment about this ?

10/10 would bang

10/10 would bang

How can you explain this mrs. Merkel ?!?



Despite our news agency several tries, we were unable to contact Angela Merkel for a response, her PR representatives stated numerous times that there aren’t any more naked photos of her. Just before writting this article I received though a signed copy of her B&W photo and an official apology.

Without getting too subjective, I think me, as well as a lot of you wonder right now if there is a link between the recent Femen actions and the german Chancellor past activities ? Only time will tell …

Women protesting (Nudity!)

5 Apr

Whenever I hear about women protesting, I get a bit happy. Comedy and nudity, two of my favorite things ! And usually with a over the top dramatic intrigue. “Save the planet, the whales, the women, the puppies, etc” . But not save the flowers, because women like dead vegetation.

Clearly some kind of protest against plants & flowers.

“You lie stupid flower, he does love me ! “

Now let’s dissect their female logic ( trust me I’m a psychologist* ). They want attention, and showing some skin gets them that. But their message gets lost & smudged between their boobs. Not only men objectify them but women aswell. See when men protest they sometimes get violent, break a few windows, burn some cars, beat up random people. This while being 100% frowned upon does causes ripples. Social instability, economic impact, political controversy. They add up somehow, decrease the rating of the certain region, and nobody likes that, politicians look bad, investors shy away, law enforcement gets accused of either weak response or abuse. Then of course some strings are pulled and the situation is controlled. But nudity, gets a different reaction :

Yeah oldman, tap that ass ... ah wait ...

Yeah oldman, tap that ass … ah wait …

I don’t wanna get into details about the significance of what they protest and honestly who cares.

wipe that smirk of your face buddy, you're at work

wipe that smirk of your face buddy, you’re at work

Don’t worry they actually act up all crazy and abused. They haven’t protested in India or Africa, and they usually pick up classy places. Lets see the video 

So it was in some square in front of a stadium. There was actually none for some good meters except the press, the stadium workers ( behind the gates ) and lastly and lately the police. Nobody else. So I imagine they spent a few hours putting make up, and drawing big thick, curvy letters on each other’s naked bodies, called the press and turn out, protest for 10-15 min till they get a ride to the police station.

The point is that as long as you protest naked, girls, no one will take you seriously – ever. Did you see Angela Merkel naked ? The Queen, Hilary Clinton or whatever powerful & independent woman is out there ? Is this why those ladies fought for equal rights back in 1900 ? Apparently so …

Enjoy some more protesting photos

*Actually I’m not

Feng Zhu Photoshop Brushes Pack

3 Apr

So I kinda enjoy his videos, he’s a really great guy – but lacking skill I was always amazed by what he does. He always says he uses default brushes but has a few that are custom made. I actually spent a few hours trying to get his flat brush reproduced and I did so with some relative success. I just wanted it and here it is.

Mmmm ... master Zhu brush , at last ! Skills .. later

Mmmm … master Zhu brush , at last ! Skills … Later !

I’ve included in this pack his tree brush, the calligraphy brushes he uses for sketching, a couple of chalk brushes he favours. Aaaaand that’s it I think. You can use Graphite 6 brush for sketching too if you favour a more round brush. I Actually use it for values too sometimes, really good all-round brush. I didn’t want a big pack, if someone reads this and wants my entire collection let me know. Hope that helps and remember skills are still required !

Edit: I actually forgot to include the brush pack – here it is the download  – http://scapefiend.deviantart.com/art/Feng-Zhu-Brush-Pack-363431446 . Enjoy !

Bioshock Infinite, not a complete letdown but … ( No Spoilers )

2 Apr

I played by accident System Shock 2 back in 2000 or so, and I was blown away. Now when Bioshock went out, I played it a bit but didn’t finish it. After a while I picked it up again. No denial, very immersive, plot driven games. The horror factor was present from SS2 a bit downed but still there and not forced like in Dead Space 2 or whatever horror shooter is out there where a pipe breaks with a creepy tune every 2 sec. The thing that I disliked in Bioshock was that that the main person who helps you it’s the main antagonist, while it was mind-blowing in SS2 it felt a bit like deja-vu  Of course if I didn’t play SS2, I’d be moreso mindblown. Still both amazing games.

Now Bioshock Infinite seemed like a bad idea. I mean OK you have a great idea for a location – underwater city. Now they went like how can we top that ? Air City ! Meh… I’d say it was a bit forced and not well thought out. I can spend 2-3 days and probably find out better designs for sky-cities .
Graphically speaking, it’s pretty amazing, but you can see they kinda focused on some areas and not on others. The thing that’s missing from the game is clever diversions. Those mini games at the start are a good idea, a bit of dialogue would have been great also, but no.

Your companion cube .. I mean cutie – Elizabeth. Dunno, I think all those other female characters are better looking, She was a bit off visually to me. She chats occasionally,  picks up coins, and throws you refills during combat. You kinda get a bit dependent on her, mostly because you can’t carry extra health potions or salts ( mana )

Mr. Levine, please don't send me back to Russia :(

Mr. Levine, please don’t send me back to Russia :(

Guns are pretty standard, which isn’t too bad, you’ll soon find your favourites and stick with them – which is actually a good idea since full upgrades are kinda pricey. Again most of the people out there favor sniper rifle. I went revolver, it’s powerful and precise, without that stalker shit that sniping involves. The carbine is a pretty good choice also, shotgun I found it lacking in the endgame.

About that … the game has only one ending, I finished it and I was like that’s what I get for being a baddie all game and went happily on YouTube to check the other endings. Surprise, Surprise … there wasn’t any.
The game misses a good brawl at the end, but mixes up a bit of nostalgia in its place which although great, just made me feel played out.
It’s a good game, but honestly I wouldn’t rush into it. It seems everybody is singing it’s praises all over the media but most of the commentaries from gamers are mostly negativish. Of course casual players might love it like hell but they miss a lot of background in gaming.

My advice, if you can’t borrow it from a friend .. haaaar ;) , try to get it on sale – Btw not much replayability and no nudity ( awww )

The grim future of Mass Effect franchise

1 Dec

So our friends at Bioware decided to ask the fans if they want a prequel or a sequel for their famous trilogy. Before we get into that let’s do a quick recap with this last year events.

Daniel Erickson – lead designer at SWTOR left,  snatched his bff Emmanuel Lusinchi  and they both went to his new company Bluepoint Games.
Rich Vogel, the former executive producer of Star Wars: The Old Republic, has found a new home with Bethesda Softworks. Wish he was a 3d artist or an animator though.

Doctors Greg Zeschuk and Ray Muzyka – the  co-founders also left. Turns out these won’t even be recycled back into the game industry. Dr. Z wants to do some social work, probably to even out the karma after he destroyed so many nerd social lives. Muzyka it’s gonna keep it even more real, he’s gonna brew beer. That’s pretty good because beers usually get pretty dissapointing at the end, his experience might come in handy.  Leaving jokes aside, that’s a good thing to do, picking up new challenges after they worked on some of the greatest games ever made it’s quite impressive.

Ok now, people will say they left because they messed up the ME3 ending, the Star Wars MMO, their LotR wannabe series – now that they’re gone all that negativity is gonna lash out on Bioware. And then what does Bioware do ? They ask the fans if they want a prequel or a sequel. After they changed the ending because they complain – they don’t put their foot down and go on with their projects. One thing a gamer learns on the internet is that the masses will never be pleased. And here is why. Assume whoever is left in charge has some good ideas about a sequel. But the fans want a prequel. What is Bioware gonna do ? Go and force those designers to do whatever the masses want. It’s like having not just one boss ( EA I assume ) but another ( customers ) . It’s like seeing Mona Lisa at the Louvre and then go digging poor Leo out of his grave and telling him that you don’t actually like ugly brunettes. That’s a recipe for a disaster.

I haven’t played ME since it got out. I understand there’s been a lot of DLCs to sweeten the aftertaste of that weak ending. But this giving in to the fans demands – worst move ever.

Here’s some comics for comic relief before dealing with the other dubious choices regarding the other Mass Effect project – the movie !

Mass Effect ending with multiple choices. Sadly in ways to die, not in partners.

Mass Effect ending with multiple choices. Sadly in ways to die, not in partners.

First the good news, the screenplay writer, named Mark Protosevich who butchered I am Legend, it’s gone. In case you didn’t knew it that one was a remake of an remake of a remake of a remake of a book adaptation. So he had like 4-5 different sources for the it, and he still messed it up. But he’s out, and you can smile again.

Not so fast ! Guess who’s in Morgan Davis Foehl, the guy whose last movies were about firemen, magic remotes (Click) and gay marriage ( I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry ).   Please contain your excitement !  Below genuine movie poster

mass effect movie

Shepard-Commander never looked better

Really ? You gonna put a guy who made soap operas and comedies in charge of a SF franchise ? I understand that he’s a fan of the series but so am I and you. By that logic even if my writing is shitty, then this article about one of my favourite games should be quite awesome. You’re welcome world !

Quick Black Ops 2 review

18 Nov

I actually played Modern Warfare 3 a few days before it and found it pretty entertaining. This is more of the same with more retro and futuristic take on firearm combat. The actual gameplay is pretty sweet, they finally change it so you can use your preferred weapons every mission, so you can finally go that silencer shotgun/colt 1911 combo we all wanted to try since we saw Anton Chigurh rocking it back in the days.

The singleplayer campaign lasts roughly the same as the previous Call of Duty game. So it’s about 6 hours, more or less. That is with me skipping all the strike missions, because although they were supposed to be interesting, they were poorly implemented. You have to defend or attack a certain location with limited crew and those CLAW (?) bots. While they presented it like it was a squad based real time strategy, you actually have to get into the boots of a random soldier or robot and do all the work yourself. While switching in between them might sound like fun, it was not. You needed better and more precise control to make the strike mission work and this rudimentary attempt did not cut it.

The story of it starts kinda slow, but picks off pace after a while. I really enjoyed the interior missions, the futuristic touch was present albeit discreet and the combat was more engaging than before. That being said there are the story choices which you won’t realize until you reach the end of the game. This was good stuff, it’ll make a game re-playable for 2-3 times more without pushing it.  It’s a good thing to see this being implemented in a  fairly linear game such as this.

The plot is rather interesting, the villain Menendez well-developed, and the friendlies. Harper is voiced by Michael Rooker, Merle from “The Walking Dead” and does a great job. There is a player choice regarding his fate, which I subjectively believe was the climax of the whole game.

High velocity bullets or heavy rain makes no difference to futuristic hairgel products

I’ll go ahead and mention here that I only played the single-player campaign so this is a half-assed review of the game, but I can assess that the multiplayer should be even better than the single experience, but a deadly timesink as it happens to these things.

In conclusion it’s a good game, even great probably. Its a good thing to see Treyarch experimenting and I can’t wait for the next one. I really hope they step it up though, maybe make some undercover missions in highly dense civilian zones. There were a few in this sequel and it was really exciting. A darker setting would have helped even more, make things more grim, more hopeless. Some limited ammunition stages or morally challenging choices. And they should get rid of that killing civilians/mission failed bullshit. Put a harsh penalty for it but don’t just end the mission just because of one stray bullet, point blank to the face. C’mon guys it’s war, let us enjoy our collateral damage.


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